RECOVERING FROM FAILED EXPECTATIONS

We had just bought a six, fresh-baked cookies. Glori, my daughter, could hardly wait to sample the warm cookie loaded with chocolate chips. 

She took a bite. Then, she frowned. The chocolate chip cookie was not as delicious as she expected.

Have you ever expected more from something, someone, or yourself, only to be left disappointed? Failure feels permanent.

But given time, you can recover from its devastation. First, keep in mind that failures are inevitable. Then, learn the steps that will lead you to recovery from failure’s devastation. 

THREE INEVITABLE SOURCES OF FAILURES 

  1. SOMEONE – You naturally trust your family and close friends. You also rely on close relationships at church or work. You vote for the government official who will best serve you. Unfortunately, one or more of these individuals will eventually fail you.
  2. THINGS – The car that first brought you joy has drained you financially. You had a great business plan. Yet, your business failed. The dress that looked so great in the store looks awful on you. Things can quickly fail!
  3. YOU – You couldn’t make the relationship work. You can’t seem to kick that addiction. You’ve disappointed yourself and failed your family. Feelings of hopelessness and defeat can quickly follow self-failure. 

RECOVERING FROM FAILED EXPECTATION

The common denominator between all types of inevitable failure is “expectation.” You expected different results. However, you can recover. The steps include acceptance and forgiveness.

Try practicing these steps for acceptance and forgiveness to recover from failed expectations.

1. Acceptance

Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God (Romans 15:7).

The closer you are to people, the more likenesses you’ll share with them.  At the same time, your familiarity can make it difficult to accept their differences.

Practice these steps for accepting others:

    • Accept the things you love about yourself. The more self-accepting you are, the more accepting you will be of others.
    • Accept the things you do not love about yourself. This does not mean you should allow bad thoughts and habits to go uncorrected. It means you should accept yourself as perfectly human.
    • Accept that even your closest family and friends think and react differently than you.

2.  Forgiveness

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23).

God does not expect you to permit others to misuse and abuse you. But inevitably, others will offend you. They may never ask for your forgiveness. Still, you must forgive them.

What good will forgiving others do you? Forgiving someone is a gift to yourself. It cures the poison that unforgiving injects into your heart and mind.

Practice these steps to forgiving others:

    • Take your focus off the person. Instead, decide what were their offensive actions toward you.
    • Honestly admit how the offensive actions hurt or angered you.
    • Grieve for your hurt, loss, disappointment, etc. Be sure to get help from others if you need it.
    • Put yourself in the offender’s place. Would you want to be forgiven? Then, pray for the strength to do the same to them.
    • Be sure to forgive yourself if needed.  Too often, your harshest critic is you.

Finally, …

Most of all, remember, Jesus will never fail you (Hebrews 13:5).

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5 thoughts on “RECOVERING FROM FAILED EXPECTATIONS”

  2. This was right on time for me. Thanks for reminding me that we all fall short. Unforgiveness can lead to bitterness and judgement of others. I am reminded to look in the mirror at the plank in my own eye. I am also reminded that God is love. As a child of the King love of self and others must be a priority. We hurt because of un -met expectations that are generally short term. We fail to understand that whatever the reason God is in control. We must forgive those who hurt us, take a look in the mirror because sometimes the truth hurts. Most of all the only one that can fulfill your expectations is Christ. Love Sis. Dean

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