This weekend I will get to visit our grandchildren in South Carolina. After hugs and kisses, I always say to them, “Look how tall you’re getting!” In one look, I can easily see all the growth that happened over several months. However, to their parents, the growth in each child is not so apparent until it’s time for new clothes or shoes.
Why begin this post on healing toxic fears with a story about growth? That is exactly how it works on this journey of transformative thinking and emotional healing.
The positive change you are desperately needing may only occur in tiny increments. You won’t see progress immediately.
I can summarize my cycle of healing in 4 steps. The great part about this cycle is it works for whatever toxic emotion you are struggling with.
Try replacing your specific emotional problem with the word “fear” in the steps below. Then follow the 4 steps to begin your journey of emotional healing.
Cycle of Healing for the Toxic Emotion of Fear
- Own Up to Your Fears
Fear originates from many sources. My many issues include growing up in alcoholism. You may have also experienced the havoc of living in addiction.
In families touched by addiction, putting on a “brave face” to hide fear and shame can begin in childhood. I always wore a brave face in public. But privately, I was suffering.
By the time I admitted to living with fear, I felt completely defeated. However, by owning up to my problem, the power of fear over me was broken! The first step toward emotional healing had begun.
- Look Upward for Help
You will need help to recover from the toxicity of living in fear. I had made a big mess of my life and needed a safe place to unload years of pain.
I was a faithful and dedicated to the church. But this secret of mine could not be solved by just attending church. I needed someone to lead me. I looked up to God alone.
- Give Up Your Fears
To stop living in fear, you must be willing to give it up. For example, it was easier for me to go along with what I did not agree with than to say, “no” and risk rejection.
My prayers soon changed from, “Please take this away” to “Please give me the strength to give this up.”
- Change Your thinking
It’s extremely important to change your thinking. I found help with negative thinking through prayer and meditation, counseling, joining a support group, and studying literature on emotional healing.
What does the wonderful person you were created to be look like? Begin to practice being that person by using the 4 steps.
Remember, the 4 steps are cyclical. Work the steps every day. If you are sincere and persistent, you will begin to see the results.
Then, find someone to bring along with us on this wonderful journey of emotional healing!
Question: Are there additional steps you can add to the 4-Step Cycle discussed above? You can leave a comment by clicking here. (You can read my Comments Policy by clicking here.)
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